The words we use have a huge influence on us. The way you talk to yourself reflects how much you love yourself. Your inner dialogue can be either kind or cruel. Language shapes our perception of the world. It shapes our interactions with both people and things. Your words shape your perception of yourself. Begin by speaking to yourself in the manner in which you would like someone else to speak to you.
Speaking to oneself is one of the most natural, yet underappreciated, abilities we have. At the same time that we learn to speak, we develop our inner voice. Both benefit from one another. However, we devote far more time and effort to improving our conversations with others than we do to improving our conversations with ourselves.
How do you usually talk to yourself?
The quality of your inner speech is critical to understanding who you are. This dialogue has some very unique characteristics, such as representing another person's point of view or perspective. It's extremely effective. Talking to yourself is the same as talking to someone else. Because you don't know what you're going to say, your words may surprise you. You become the best person you can speak to by improving your inner dialogue, and you build a strong inner foundation to believe in yourself. However, you must select the appropriate words for this to work.
Mind Your Words
Words are the rain that grows flowers. The power of words comes from the belief we have in them . We believe and embody our words.
Our brain is ‘hard-wired’ to be negative. Neuroscience shows that the majority of our self-talk and the words we speak to ourselves are negative and it’s working against us. These negative thoughts make us feel angry, irritated, frustrated, and hopeless. Remember that our words affect our emotions, motivation, and potential accomplishments.
A strategy to develop kinder conversations with ourselves
Here’s a five-step strategy for speaking positive words to ourselves:
1. Increase Awareness: To create change, you need to be aware that something needs to be modified. Pay attention to how you talk to yourself and the impact of your words.
2. Use Positive Affirmations: Positive affirmations have many benefits, such as improved reduced stress and improved health . Here are a couple of affirmations for you to practice with.
“I know who I am and I am enough.”
“I am in control of the way I respond to the behavior of others.”
3. Replace words: The easiest way to erase certain words from your inner dialogue is to replace them with others. Moving forward try replacing:
“I’ can’t” by “I will.”
“I have to” by “I want to.”
“I should” by “I choose to”
4. Pause, Reflect & Talk: As you become more aware of the words you use, practice reflection. Pause for a couple of seconds. Evaluate your thoughts. Is that hurtful or helpful? Reflect on the words you were using. If they hurt you, go back and see how you can ‘erase-and-replace’ those words.
To wrap it up, words are powerful but don’t expect miracles. New habits form when new strategies are learned and applied. Change takes time and practice. The words you tell yourself can be compassionate or cruel. Treat yourself kindly.